Come Hell or High Water

Written By Gillian Rodriguez

Dispatches from a Traumatic Grief Specialist & How To Navigate Loss After Catastrophic Flooding

Written by Gillian Rodriguez, MA, LPC

1. The Shock of the Flood: Trauma in the Wake of the Deluge

You navigated life one way—your routines, your home, the sounds of birds, the familiar softness of sheets and warm blankets in a cozy bed—when in the darkness of night, everything changed. The floods that struck the Texas Hill Country on July 4, 2025, came with overwhelming force, flooding homes and hearts, washing away who, and what we most love. In the immediate aftermath, many survivors reported feelings of disbelief, numbness, or even denial. There is also terror; were my loved ones scared in their final moments? Could it happen again? Will every rain return every pain? It’s as though the mind protects itself by refusing to accept what’s happened, or racing thoughts creating such extremes it’s hard to see a new normal emerge.

From a therapeutic standpoint, this is a trauma response—a defense that keeps overwhelming pain at bay, even when danger has passed. Flashbacks, intrusive images of rushing water, anxiety at the sound of rain or dripping pipes, or a jumpy startle response are all signs of trauma. These reactions are valid and natural responses to an unnatural event, but if they persist or intensify, interfere with your daily life, or emotionally impact you in a way that’s getting worse instead of better, Trellis Counseling & Co. PLLC provides professional traumatic grief counseling support.

2. Carrying the Weight of “Why Me?” — Survivor’s Guilt

Among the most painful responses is survivor’s guilt: the feeling that you shouldn’t have survived when others didn’t—or that you could have done more to help. You may replay moments endlessly: “If I had just gotten everyone up and to the car a few minutes earlier…” For some, this guilt becomes debilitating, creating an inner narrative that dismisses their experience of loss and assumes an expectation of superhuman performance in an unknown, inexperienced situation (the floods).

As a therapist, I remind survivors that guilt is not a moral indicator—it’s an emotional response. It does not reflect your character or your real choices in crisis. Acknowledging guilt openly can begin to release its grip.

“What no one needs in the midst of struggle, is shame for being human.” -Brené Brown

3. A Different Kind of Mourning: Homes, Belongings, Landscapes

While the loss of human life is most acute, grief after a flood goes deeper. You’re mourning a dwelling, a home, a cabin or space that embodied safety, routine, identity—your sanctuary. You had to escape from a place that was itself once your escape. You’re grieving possessions imbued with memories: family photos, heirlooms, furniture. And you're mourning altered landscapes: beloved old Oaks, giant Cypress, beloved trails and riverbanks—forever altered, scattered piles of debris.

This grief is complex. It’s sorrow for things—but also for lost meaning, for a fractured sense of safety and place. Recognizing such mourning as legitimate is essential. You are permitted to feel it, name it, and express your emotions toward a seemingly indifferent and unkind natural world. After the floods, there were periods of bright, summery sunshine and as I looked at the rays streaming through the brokenness of the woods around me, I couldn’t help but think, “This is the most gaslighting thing I have ever experienced.” How could something so destructive and lacking in compassion one day, be so light and warm the next? The mind wonders, indeed.

4. The Healing Power of Nature—and of Ourselves

Nature, remarkably, often leads the way back. I know, I know. Rivers, water, spaces filled with so many of the aforementioned horrors and heartaches can’t possibly be what heals us…can they? In the weeks and months following flooding, you might notice green shoots pushing through mud, birds returning to treetops, small animals reclaiming their dens to settle in. Even as our Texas Hill Country cascades into fall, the transience of nature shows us just how this works. One season we are abundant with greenery and life; the next we fade, fold and fall. What nature teaches us is whatever the season, the loss is forever. There is no leaf that falls that will ever be replaced by another leaf; similar, maybe, but never the same. Yet, we are able to recognize it’s shape and essence as signs of new life emerge yet again, proving once again that there is more to our story. This resilience reminds us that renewal—even after devastation—is possible.

Similarly, humans hold deep regenerative capacities. Small steps matter: clearing debris becomes reclaiming ground; planting seeds—literal or metaphorical—shows that despite the pain of today, we still believe in tomorrow. Building doesn’t have to replicate what was lost—it can reflect new priorities: safety, and strength. Sharing our stories, memorializing those lost, keeping this conversation and our hearts open will loom a new fabric of our community, interwoven with tragedy and hope.

5. Resources for Those Affected by the Texas Hill Country Floods (July  4,  2025)

For professional counseling support, reach out to Trellis or consider an option listed here. Below are trusted resources offering emotional, practical, legal and financial support.

  1. Community Foundation of the Texas Hill Country – Kerr County Flood Relief Fund

  2. Kerr County Relief & Volunteer Coordination – Salvation Army, Kerrville

  3. FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency)

    • Phone: 1‑800‑621‑3362

    • Apply for disaster assistance or reapply for denied claims; in-person support at recovery centers in Kerrville and Hunt KSAT

  4. Texas Rio Grande Legal Aid (TRLA)

    • Phone: (956) 996‑8752 or (833) 329‑8752 (Mon–Fri, 9 a.m.–5 p.m.)

    • Legal help with FEMA appeals, housing, documents, public benefits The Texas Tribune

  5. State Bar of Texas – Legal Hotline

    • Phone: 800‑504‑7030 (English, Spanish, Vietnamese)

    • Free legal assistance for low-income Texans with disaster-related issues The Texas Tribune

  6. SAMHSA Disaster Distress Helpline

    • Phone/Text: 800‑985‑5990

    • Trained crisis counselors offering emotional support, coping tips The Texas Tribune

  7. National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline

  8. The Texas Hill Country Counselors Association: https://thcca-chapter.txca.org/portals/thccaResources

  9. Hill Country Family Services: https://hcfstx.org/

  10. Hill Country Daily Bread Ministries: https://www.hillcountrydailybread.org/get-help

  11. Hill Country MHDD: https://hillcountry.org/1568-2/

In Closing

Floodwaters may recede, but grief—shock, trauma, dislocation—can linger. Yet within this landscape of mourning lies the potential for renewal, connection, and growth. Nature shows us—though fragile and shaky, we will rise again. We, too, can reclaim our roots, rebuild our foundations, and restore our hope.

You are not alone. Your grief is valid and is a testament to your relationships with others, with things and places, with nature itself. I hope these resources offer tangible support and affirmation of the strength already within you. Connect with us if you would benefit from professional support.

With compassionate solidarity,
Gillian

Gillian Rodriguez
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Letting Go of Loss Does Not Mean Letting Go of Your Loved One